State of affairs
You know what’s ironic?
A few weeks ago, I was trying to compose a text message to a friend about feeling rejected. When I wrote rejected using the T9 predictive text, the first word to come up was selected.
2007 has definitely not been my year for being selected. Instead, I keep getting rejected. I’ve taken lots of L’s (losses) this year. Take a look:
- January: submitted conference proposal, it was rejected (repeat two more times in August and November!).
- April: boyfriend breaks up with me. I try to plead my case a few weeks later in May. He still says it’s best if we’re not together.
- May: apply for the legislative liaison position with the Graduate Students Association. Get passed up for someone with more experience. Ah, politics.
- November: X, the guy I’d been dating for a couple months, gets bored/disinterested/whatever with me and we stop dating.
- November: take qualifying exam. Doesn’t go so well. Have to retake one of three questions.
I’m hopeful 2008 will be better and that I’ll find “someone who cares about the world as much as I do” or just get some serious work done toward graduating.
A little gift: State of Affairs by Los Abandoned [right click, save as]… sigh. They broke up too.
I’m not very good at making friends (a fact which is painfully obvious now that I’ve relocated) so I’ve realized that 2008 is going to have to be a more proactive year for me — despite the fear of rejection. sigh. Things are such a process sometimes! I’ve decided my motto for the coming year will be “Open and Receptive But Selective”
People laugh at me when they hear that I’ve added Selective, but hey, I may be in need of friends but I’m not desperate! ;D It has to be about quality over quantity right?
I hope the coming year brings you a lot more Yes-es. Feliz Navidad!
well the bright side is that 2008 will only have to be halfway decent for it be be better than 2007 was for you… plus your Dodgers got Joe Torre and Andruw Jones so you’ve got that going for you!
thanks for the song. keep your head up.
Year’s not over. Your due some good karma.
hang in there girl. one of my friends keeps telling me that i need to be more comfortable with the idea of being rejected–like i should try to bounce back from rejection more quickly. maybe that’s true for things like conference papers and job applications, but for other things, i’m thinking its so much easier said than done. anyway, there’s 10 more days left in 2007. you never know what they’ll bring!
i’ve been rejected so many times that it just doesn’t bother me anymore. i’ve simply developed an immunity.
because of that, i somehow ended up being audacious and am able to take big risks. and that has often yielded some fuck’n awesome consequences.
if you get rejected enough, you might reach that level of apathy and audacit…, and that is something to take great comfort in!
(at least i think so)
Keep your chin up sister! I have felt very similar this year but rejection makes us more loveable, accessible, approachable. That’s what I keep telling myself anyway. Also, have you listened to the Rancid song “Rejected”? It’s good…an energetic way to wallow, if that’s possible.
Think of it as getting all those rejections out of your system. 2008 will be the year of actual (and not typo-induced) selection.
I would focus on the many blessings you have/had this year:
-you were listed as a ‘hot blogger’ or something like that
-you are part of a lot of peoples daily reading, my self included, which means you are included everyday in peoples lives
-you have an amazing family, or so it seems from what you write: the food drop offs, so cool
-you have raised your guitar hero stats
-you became a part of Puro Pedo magazine
-you traveled
-you may be single but at least you aren’t with someone who doesn’t want to be with you
-your resume didn’t really need those conferences and grad student position to make you look good on paper, you have so much more to put in there
-re-taking a test, in the final results, will only show a higher passing score
you are blessed
the stumbles are only there to remind you that you aren’t THAT perfect, and we all need that every now and then, otherwise we get all cocky n stuck up.
great to see you at the pocho hour of power party.
you are great!
remember that.
I don’t mean to laugh. But something about this post gave me a little giggle. I think it’s how you write. You seem to be taking it all in stride. Some years are better than others my friend.