Way back when I started college ten years ago (!), I did what everyone else did: look myself up in the online directory. I wanted to see what information was listed so I could change it if needed, you know since I had so many potential stalkers.

I searched my first and last name and found something shocking and completely unexpected. I was not the only Cynthia Mosqueda on campus. Gasp!

I was upset for the rest of the day. I wanted to kick someone, preferably my tocaya (namesake). Of course, I had no reason to kick her. In fact, she didn’t have my name, I had her name. She was a senior and I was a freshman (I’ve never met her, but my section leader in band knew her). I thought about complaining to my parents about their name choice. Perhaps they should have named Veronica like they originally planned. They dropped the name when some friends chose the name for their daughter born just a few months before me. At least then, I wouldn’t have found my tocaya for another 8 years or so until I met my cousin Julio’s fiancé and they got married. Up until college, I’d never met a Mosqueda that was not related to me. I thought my last name was rather rare and I liked it that way.

I quit my pouting after a day or two. A few months later, la tocaya was gone from the directory as she graduated and moved on. All was right in the world and I was the only Cynthia M in the directory… for a while.

Last fall I started to get a bit freaked out by some comments made online. I wanted to make sure the harassment didn’t move beyond creepy comments, so I double checked my entry on the campus directory.

She was back. And worse, la tocaya was in my department. Since I’m hardly ever at the ed school and she’s in a different program, I’ve never met her. After a conversation with Oso about finding another white David Sasaki on Facebook, I decided to look up my tocaya.

Not only does she have my name, she’s also cuter than me. Damn. At least I’ll be Dr. Cynthia Mosqueda before her.