When I put up the April Fool’s day post about a civil wedding, I didn’t bother informing my parents or siblings. They occasionally read my blog, but I didn’t think they’d read that day nor fall for the joke. I was wrong on the latter. My mom read it later in the week and called my dad a little confused. “Am I losing my memory?” she asked him.
He read the post and was fooled too until he got to the end. “You got us good,” he told me.
Silly parents.
I spent Sunday afternoon in Ontario at a last minute birthday BBQ to celebrate Nancy’s birthday. As usual, hanging out with the cousins was filled with a lot of laughs, games, and an accident or two*.
Early in the afternoon, I played four square with the cousins and catch with the nephews. The nephews were a lot less competitive, but that’s probably because they’re toddlers and still getting the hang of throwing and catching.
Later, we had cake and strung up the piñata. After some swings by the few kids present, the adults took over. I got a couple of good hits, but mainly missed.
Even though I missed a lot, the guys didn’t. The piñata lost an eye.
After Adrian beat up the piñata, tío Pancho threw candy from the roof. As I shot the photo, I thought the situation looked sketchy and backed up a little. Those candy scrambles are always risky, especially when the goodies are thrown from higher up.
Unfortunately, I was right. Adrian left the melee with more than some Snickers. Ouch.
Lesson: piñatas can be dangerous for adults too.
*The accidents don’t happen often. We’re not that reckless or clumsy.
My brother, Danny, invited Sean and I to a Valentine’s dinner over the weekend. I know V-Day isn’t a family oriented holiday, but Danny’s a trained chef and it’s kinda rare that I get to eat anything he makes. Whenever I see him he’s usually exhausted from work. Sean liked the idea of a home-cooked gourmet meal rather than going out to a restaurant.
Traffic from LA to Hacienda Heights was horrible, but it was worth it. Danny made a delicious dinner with a little help from me, Lori and Costco. I like helping him out, it actually makes me feel like I know something about cooking.
We sat down to dinner a little late, but it was fine with me and accommodated my parents’ schedule.
Green salad
Shrimp in a cayenne butter sauce with garlic asparagus
Filet mignon with a mushroom sauce, shrimp, roasted potatoes, asparagus and carrots (not pictured: garlic bread from the grocery store)
Apple pie a la mode (from Costco)
I was so stuffed.
My favorites were definitely the cayenne shrimp and the mushroom sauce.
As or VR, he was really working the puppy dog eyes angle to get some steak.
My celebration of love typically comes two weeks before February 14 when my extended family gathers to celebrate Papá Chepe and Mamá Toni’s wedding anniversary.
I believe the Ureño Saldivar family has been throwing anniversary parties since 1968, the 25th anniversary.
I don’t remember the party for 40th anniversary, but I was there in a frilly dress.
I do recall the huge party for 50 and the whole family dressed in forest green and gold. I thought it was so cool that my grandparents had reached such a milestone. A year later, my fathers’ parents, Grandpa Bartolo and Grandma Juana, also celebrated their 50th anniversary.
Most of the celebrations are low-key, save for the numbers divisible by 5. Since the 60th anniversary, we’ve gathered annually on the last weekend of January to share a meal and celebrate the beginning of our little* extended family.
This January, the 69th anniversary, we celebrated love, luck, longevity and loyalty. After all, love isn’t all you need to stay together for nearly seven decades.
*The Saldivar family had a big reunion in 2003 (or 04?). After studying a huge family tree, I realized that Mamá Toni’s branch of the family is much smaller than most of her brothers’ and sisters’ families. I have a few cousins compared to my mom.
Years ago, my mom complimented a woman on her hat as she walked out of Sunday Mass. I watched as the woman accepted the compliment and said something like, “Oh, you can have it!”
Mom tried to protest, but the woman insisted and placed the red hat on mom’s head. Mom got a new hat and a story to tell with it.
Anyway, I didn’t think she still had the hat until Sunday when she brought it out. I still don’t know why she brought it out, but it quickly became a photo prop. First Adrian tried it on, then Valerie, then me, Sean, Josie and mom.
Who do you think wore it best? Clockwise from top left: Sean, Adrian, Josie, Mom, Valerie.
The Diptic app only has room for 5 photos, so I left myself out of the collage.
Dear GP,
Happy birthday!
When I look back at these photos, I’m reminded of a great year in which our bond as sisters grew stronger. It also reminds me of what I already know: you’re a beautiful bad-ass. They’re not so good at showing that you’re smart, kind, hardworking, generous, talented, funny and an excellent cupcake/cookie/brownie baker. Nor do they capture how lucky I feel to have you in my life.
Here’s to another year of getting all dolled up, being goofy when appropriate (or not), exploring new places and admiring nature, running a race or two, and keeping stress in check for that little event in September.
Love you more than Lilo loves Stitch,
C
Last year, I wrote that I never fantasized about my wedding. I lied. I thought about dresses and honeymoon locations a lot as a kid.
My family used to visit my mom’s brother and his family in San Diego a few times a year. I loved the visits to tío Beto and tía Ana’s house mainly for the pool and hot tub in the back yard.
When I wasn’t in the pool or watching TV, I was in the waiting/dressing room outside tía Ana’s workshop. The garage had been converted to a workspace where tía Ana constructed beautiful wedding gowns and other formal dresses. I didn’t spend too much time in garage. It was crowded with the large worktable, bolts of shiny white fabric and lace, 2 or 3 sewing machine work stations, and an ironing board and steamer. Plus, I was likely to get a spare pin in my foot or get my grubby hands on some expensive fabric.
The waiting/dressing room was a safe space. There was a couch, plenty of space and dozens of bridal magazines. I’d flip through these stacks admiring the lovely gowns and baffled by the advice sections. I never knew addressing wedding invitations could be so complicated. I don’t recall any longterm impressions from the gowns or what I thought of them aside from “oooh, pretty!” I do recall the honeymoon and travel sections. I adored the photos of white beaches and blue oceans in tropical locales. They reminded me of the beaches I saw in my parents’ photos from their anniversary trip to Cancún. It was through Brides or Modern Bride that I learned of the Poconos and the champagne-shaped hot tubs in honeymoon suites. They looked cool, but I was confused as to how people actually got in them. (I’m still not really sure where the Poconos are.)
Tía Ana made the flower girl dress I wore for another aunt’s wedding; she also made the dresses for the bride and the bridal party. That flower girl dress was reused twice as a First Communion dress and as a Halloween costume. She also made the poofy pink and white dress I wore for my quinceañera.
She gave up the business a while ago, so I can’t go to her to make my wedding dress. I’m not sure she’d want me as a client anyway. I’m too indecisive about these things.
The second family Christmas party felt like déjà vu from last week.
The similarities:
We had an abundance of delicious food and desserts. Everyone contributed something to the spread.
Family came in from out of town to join the festivities. Our out-of-state family members didn’t make the trip, but it was great to see the family from San Diego.
Minel did his part for the adorable baby/toddler quota.
One of my male family members volunteered to dress up as Santa and pass out gifts. Last week it was my cousin Jesus, this week it was tío Beto. Of course, Minel wasn’t into the Santa thing. He was just as resistant as Olivia last week. [Side note: even though Minel and Olivia are not related, I think they could be fraternal twins. It must be the curly hair and the proximity in age.]
Dad got out the guitar and we sang some Christmas carols. Adrian accompanied him on the snare drum.
I brought a second beautiful piñata and my cousins’ kids gave it a beating. Since these kids are older, taller and stronger, we had to handicap them in some way. After diving in to the melee for some candy, Padrino José passed out the bolo, or the traditional grab bag of peanuts, cookies, candies and tangerines.
Once again, I felt like I got hosed when it came to the height genes when standing next to my tall cousins. Nancy, Vanny, Valerie and my sister will all be part of my wedding party next year. I either need to make them wear flats or wear the highest heels I can find, if only for photos.
I forgot my camera this week and relied on my iPhone. Luckily, Sean brought along his camera and tried out his new flash and diffuser. He was a good sport being the unofficial photographer.
The differences:
Instead of doing a white elephant, we were much nicer an did a Secret Santa. Sean picked Papá Chepe and bought him a newsboy cap. I think he wears it well.
Also, we played some games. In the past we’ve done Wii games and karaoke. This year we kept it less physical with a round of Taboo amongst the cousins.
We got to open more presents!
Christmas Day was super low key as it’s been for the last 10+ years. Since we went to Mass on Christmas Eve, I just spent the afternoon and evening lounging around the parents’ house. My brothers spent most of the day with their girlfriends so it was just Lori, the parents, Sean and me. We watched a few basketball games, ate leftovers for dinner, and played card games. It wasn’t too different from most Sundays.
A few years ago my family began hosting an annual Christmas party for the Mosqueda side of the family. I think for several years after my grandparents passed, it felt like we’d lost some of our holiday traditions. We always host the party a week or so before Christmas so that it doesn’t conflict with Christmas Eve gatherings. Typically, Mexicans gather on Christmas Eve and do all the fun stuff — including presents — then.
This year my family hosted the biggest party. Part of the family who moved out to Texas years ago returned. It was good to see my aunts and uncles again. Last year, tía Nellie and tío Rick came to LA for tío Joe’s funeral. This time they brought their spouses and kids to celebrate and have fun.
After a dinner that included the requisite tamales and several other options (roast beef, pasta, meatballs, fried chicken, etc) and digging in to the dessert table, my dad got out his guitar and we sang a few Christmas carols.
Santa showed up shortly afterward and the kids went crazy. Well, most of them. My cousin’s 18 month old wasn’t too keen on sitting on his lap. The adults didn’t get anything from Santa except a photo op.
We cleared out the tables and set up the piñata. Even if Isabelle hadn’t asked me a few times when it was time to break the piñata, she would’ve gone first as one of the youngest. Again, her little sister wasn’t interested.
The adults played a white elephant game, we took lots of photos and then cleaned up.
I’m glad I didn’t miss this year’s party. Last year I was in New York with Sean. This year he got to meet the Texas side of the family. It was nice to hear my tía Nellie welcome him in to the family.
Even though I attended a few low key holiday parties for Job1 and Job2 last week, I didn’t really feel in the holiday spirit. It usually takes me a few weeks in to December to begin to feel like it’s Christmas. This weekend I couldn’t help it. Seeing toddlers go crazy for Santa and singing carols with my family is enough to snap me out of my grinch mood. Candy and baked goods help too.
Photos mainly by Sean.
Las posadas begin today and continue all the way until Christmas Eve. Reading Maura’s post on what las posadas mean to her reminded me that I need to buy the piñata for the first of two family Christmas parties on Saturday. Actually, I’m on piñata duty for both parties.
Anyway, the piñata comes after my favorite part. Singing “Las Posadas Villancicos”, or the actual song sung by two groups, one indoors and one outdoors.
En nombre del cielo
os pido posada,
pues no puede andar
mi esposa amada.Aquí no es mesón
sigan adelante,
yo no puedo abrir
no sea algún tunante.
It goes on for several more stanzas.
For our family parties, we don’t actually go to our neighbors’ homes. Some of them would have no clue what we’re doing. And it’s been 20+ years since we did anything as elaborate as making costumes and setting up a nativity scene complete with an actual baby and a stuffed donkey.
We go much more low key. Our posadas are just a part of the family party. We split up the group in two. One goes outside and sings the part of Joseph asking for lodging. The second group sings the part of the innkeepers denying Mary and Joseph a place to stay.
My favorite part is always the joyful end when the kind innkeepers let in the Mary and Joseph and the tone of the song becomes much more joyful, “entre santos peregrinos.”
I can’t fault Maura for focusing on the food. I love ponche, canela (above), chocolate, champurrado and other sweet drinks to warm one up on a cold night. Paired with a buñuelo or some pan dulce, it’s even better.
But when it comes to las posadas and the family party, I’m too busy singing to grab a bite or a drink.