What’s up to all my friends, lovers, and drunken makeout partners! El Rio’s Valentine’s Day Cards are back in the ring to take another swing for 2010! This is the 4th year of my cards and it’s turned into my longest running project. Enjoy!
As always, please post these cards on the pages of your friends, enemies, sexting partners, craigslist hookups, and friends with benefits. To see an archive of cards from years past CLICK HERE.
After several weeks of preparation, Judge Sonia Sotomayor was finally confirmed in the Catholic Church.
During the weeks and months leading up to the confirmation, Sotomayor met with confirmation teachers at St. Matthew’s Cathedral in Washington D.C. to review the Catholic Catechism. She studied such cases as David v. Goliath, Jonah v. Whale and, the civil suit, Jesus Christ v. Judas Iscariot.
Sotomayor’s confirmation classes did not transpire without controversy. When studying a passage in the bible about the trial of Jesus Christ, Sotomayor remarked that she would have judged him differently. She added, “I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experiences would, more often than not, reach a better conclusion than a Roman male who hasn’t lived that life.”
Conservative Catholics criticized Sotomayor’s credentials and temperament. Thomas Sanderson, a spokesman for the Knights of Columbus, argued that Sotomayor should not be confirmed. He added, “She may have gone to a Catholic high school, but she’s hardly Catholic. She got divorced, she attends Mass only on Christmas and Easter, she does not tithe, and we do not know her views on abortion or gay marriage.”
Nevertheless, Sotomayor was still confirmed. During the confirmation Mass, Bishop Patrick O’Callaghan (R-VA) asked Sotomayor several difficult questions about her faith such as “do you believe in God, the Creator?” and “do you believe in the Holy Ghost and in the Catholic Church?” Dressed in her own judge robe, Sotomayor showed no emotion as she responded “I believe” to each question. When asked if she renounced Satan and all his scandal in the world, she quickly responded positively.
Following the affirmation of her faith, Sotomayor — who chose Maria as her saint name in honor of her Latina roots — was blessed with chrism (a holy oil) by Bishop O’Callaghan. After she was blessed, her sponsor, Vice President Joe Biden, whispered an unknown comment in her ear.
Celina Baez, Sotomayor’s mother wiped away tears as she praised her daughter’s accomplishments, “I never thought I’d see this day. She’s an example to all Latinas. Her father, Juan, would be so proud. May he rest in peace.”
The Sotomayor and Biden family celebration the confirmation with a dinner of lechón asado con arroz y gandules.
El Chavo told me not to take his post about the problem with Hacienda Heights personally. I told him: “maybe I should start writing negative posts about Lincoln Heights or other parts of the Eastside. I’ve been there enough times to make observations and form opinions about singular events.” I went through with it… sort of. I basically played Mad Libs with the original post. You know us kids raised in the suburbs, we’re so unoriginal and ready to copy the latest trend!
I’ve never talked shit about the neighborhoods to my east (or west, if I position myself in Hacienda Heights) on my blog/blogs I’ve contributed to. I had no reason to start bashing the Eastside or its neighborhoods. Some of my best friends and family were born, raised and still live in the Eastside. I didn’t want to ruin relationships or create hostilities with them.
However, it’s impossible for my sense of decency to keep quiet. The Eastside, particularly Lincoln Heights, creates odd behavior patterns, maybe perfectly reasonable within the context of their own reality but utterly absurd when exposed to the light of reason.
Take for example this banana peel spotted in the parking lot of a LH Big Saver Foods a few weeks ago. I don’t understand why the consumer of this banana could not just toss the peel in a garbage can rather than leave the peel on the ground. Maybe folks in LH missed the classic cartoon lesson — or have never played Mario Kart — banana peels are dangerous. Someone (that would be me) could slip and fall. Luckily, I have decent reflexes and caught my balance before taking a fall. I doubt an Abuelita out to buy some groceries would have been so lucky. She might have broken a hip bone. I don’t get it. Are there no garbage cans on Broadway or the Big Saver Foods grocery store? I have no idea, but whatever the “logic” that led to the careless parking lot disposal of this banana peel, it just points to some warped thinking happening on these streets (or cars, I guess a LH driver could have thrown the banana out of his/her car). Fucking negligent thinking.
I almost considered picking up the peel and disposing of it properly, but neh pollos, who knows what kinda germs are on that banana peel. I didn’t even have my Purell in my purse.
If people can build opinions about Hacienda Heights from a lone Christmas tree tossed to the curb on Christmas afternoon, isn’t it appropriate that I be able to form an opinion from some random sighting on my way out to a delicious dinner in LH? I think the notion of justice demands I create a similar prejudice, just to be fair.
Puro Pedo Magazine’s new issue came out this week. To download a pdf copy just click here. The following article, “10 Signs You Are Dating an Insecure Pendejo,” was written by a few women on staff and is in this month’s issue. I’m sure you can add your own signs. We came up with about two dozen, but had to whittle down the list.
As an independent Chicana it can be hard to find a partner that embraces you and doesn’t feel like he’s walking in your shadow. The mujeres of Puro Pedo Magazine have devised 10 Insecure Pendejo Indicators to help you out in your quest to find someone as wonderful as you..
After breaking up, he keeps calling to ask why you havent called him.
He decides he wants a second chance only after you have moved on.
After 9 months of dating, he still hasnt changed his relationship status on MySpace.
He gives you a quota of three accomplishments per year.
His idea of fun is watching Family Guy and drinking beer.
He is more concerned with your weight than he is with his own.
He keeps asking you for a threesome for his birthday.
He gets jealous when you hug your male cousins at family parties.
He convinces you not to break up with him so that he can break up with you later.
You read this article to him and hes not laughing.
Tu sabes, if he is an insecure pendejo he just might not be secure enough to be with you so dont be an insecure pendeja and move on.
DISCLAMER: The material for this article came from a variety of sources. Any similarities to an actual insecure pendejo is out of mere coincidence.
On the Puro Pedo Magazine masthead, i’m listed as a writer. That’s a lie. For most of the nine issues of the magazines, I’ve left the writing to funnier people on the staff. I usually just help run our mailing list and blog. (Oh yeah, if you want to subscribe, you can send an email to subscribe@NOSPAMpuropedomagazine.com.)
This issue is different. I actually wrote something. To download the pdf of the February issue, click the cover image above or click here.
In this issue:
Aztlan’s Next Top Chola
Why Pochos Love the Raiders
Activist Caught at Wal*Mart While Drinking Coke
Search for Carmen San Diego Ends in Guantanamo
Special Valentine’s Day Cards by Rio Yañez
Puro Pedro: 20 questions with Efren Ramirez
Great Moments in Chican@ History: The MEChA Meeting that Started on Time
10 Tips to Help Barack Obama get the Elusive Latino Vote
Indigenous Group Sues Disney for Copyright Infringement
Writers Strike Ends, Comedian Relieved
Lonely Hearts advertisement
Mariachi Road Crew by Jerry Gonzalez
If you like it, let me know. If you don’t, let me know too. I don’t mind criticism.
I don’t have a Valentine this year which means I don’t have to worry about finding the perfect card and gift. And I also don’t have to pretend to like some gift that will just collect dust in the corner. (No, I’m not bitter. Really.)
But Valentine’s Day isn’t only for those in relationships. Single folks can celebrate like we did in elementary school: by passing out silly cards, drinking punch and eating heart-shaped sugar cookies.
This year, I’ll pass out Rio Yañez’s great cards once again. Rio’s new set of cards feature dramatic duos like Biggie and Tupac, Frida and Diego, and Dylan and Brenda as well as some iconic figures.
Rio encourages you to share the cards with “your friends, enemies, shorties, sanchos, and booty calls.” Just make sure they’ll appreciate the genius of a card featuring Antonio Gonzalez declaring that he’d “lie under oath for you.”
To check out more of the new cards and some from Valentine’s Day 2007, go to the flickr set, Rio’s blog or click the image above.
During my last week of vacation, I made it a point to check out some of LA’s museums. On Thursday, I went to the Murakami exhibit at the Geffen Contemporary at MOCA. Entrance to MOCA is free on Thursdays after 5 pm. As a result, there were a lot of people in the museum. I know little about Japanese anime, contemporary art, or Murakami so I tagged along with one of the cute guides (by the way, he was Latino, but he didn’t have a goatee).
The next day, I attend First Fridays at the Natural History Museum. Sea Wolf was headlining the event. My friend and I arrived a little too late for the lecture on mammals and brains (or something like that). We opted to wander around the museum, check out the exhibits and learn something. We figured we could do the nerdy thing on campus by just sitting in on a biology lecture or something.
I must have had Murakami on my mind, because an ancient Peruvian figurine reminded me of Kaikai and Kiki, two Murakami characters.
When I showed the photo at work, one my co-workers said the Peruvian figurine was more Stitch than Murakami. What do you think?
If you guys aren’t downloading the latest issues of Puro Pedo Magazine, then you’re missing out. I think it’s funny, but maybe that’s ’cause I’m biased and I contribute to the magazine. Even if you don’t read it, I think it’s quite nice to look at.
To get the pdf version, click the cover to the right or click here.
To pick up a the glossy, full-color copy, visit any of these locations:
Nahui Ohlin
1511 W. Sunset Blvd., Echo Park, CA 90026
T. 213.202.6550
Teocintli
2701 E. 4th Street, East Los Angeles, CA 90033
(across from Roosevelt High School)
T. 323.266.2117
Imix Bookstore
5052 Eagle Rock Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90041
T. 323.257.2512
Antigua Cultural Coffee House
4836 Huntington Drive South, Los Angeles, CA 90032
T. 323.539.CAFE [2233]
For future news and info on when the latest issue is released, subscribe to the email list (subscribe@NOSPAMpuropedomagazine.com). We promise we won’t send spam.
